Student Coverage

Someone sent us some photos of horses -and you know our feelings about them- blocking Park Street while some pedestrians argue with them. We aren't going to put them up as the process of anonymising the pictures is too tricky to do reliably, however it is depressing to see people on foot and horse slowing our van journeys round the city. Apparently over in London they even got in the way of some important people, which we feel is unfair reporting by the BBC. For us, the white van drivers of the city, every journey is critical to keeping this vast city alive, whereas some jolly to the theatre by some royal family members is just that: entertainment. Furthermore, we aren't sure that the royal family pay road tax, and you know our thoughts there: no road tax, no road rights.
 

It's interesting to hear the audience, especially the "off with their heads" chants. Presumably those are history students who do understand the traditional rituals of regicide in Europe, as practiced in Britain and more recently across the waters in France and elsewhere.

We don't do bias -we report the real issues of the city. Here we see a row of students waiting by a bus stop, all with their orange supermarket shopping bags. We don't care that they are government funded, because looking at the long term return on investment/tax revenue opportunties, they have more chance of paying their way than, say, old people with free bus passes and prescriptions. However, the students walk, they take buses, they get in our way.

We are grateful for the new governments plans to reduce the free cash future students will have, so reducing the likelihood of them shopping in supermarkets, or getting buses home afterwards.

If there is one thing we have complaints about, however, it is the policing, especially the horses and the helicopter. That helicopter is noisy! We understand now why over in Co. Armargh they used to shoot at them. It was to get some sleep. 

Breaking news: congestion in the city centre

"Mike" sends us a note to point out that the Evening Post has finally stopped going on about football stadiums and cyclists in shopping streets in nailsea, and instead focused on the key problem of the city: congestion caused by hundreds of students.

As usual, we got our coverage in days earlier. If somebody is now surprised that it takes a while to get out of town by the M32 at 17:00, they don't know the secret routes through Broadmead or St Pauls. Tourists.

Bristol Indymedia has some more coverage. While we are against students, obviously, some of them may go on to earn enough to afford decent cars -but with these proposed funding changes, they may be forced to walk, cycle or use public transport for many years after graduating.

Police work over the University

For some reason we could not get our van down Whiteladies Road and over to the M32 this afternoon, so had to divert up the hill and hit the Highbury Vaults for a few beers before continuing. One thing we could see was this police helicopter circling the university quarter, which may be a sign of student unrest.

Students! Yes the government is going to massively increase fees for all future degree students, and take away the attendee allowance for anyone in higher education colleges. But the collapse of the economy implies the chances of you being in the payback part of the scheme is much less likely than you think! Furthermore, this government has abolished all funding for speed cameras! For that reason alone, we cannot come out and support you. That and the traffic jams you have created today!

Welcome Back

Bristol is a University City. In fact we have two of them.
Bristol is a Universities City!

So it's great to welcome back our important student population at this time of year.

Of course, to achieve a place at any University you need hard work, intelligence and determination. And probably parents with the same qualities, but we'll let that debate simmer in the main-stream press.

Here we see what could be intelligent students arriving (or possibly retuning), helped out by their intelligent parents (we refer to the cars, not the residents of Clifton navigating a route between them).

How do we know this?

Well, it's because of their amazing assimilation of Bristol's unique parking rules within hours of arriving in the City. Yes, the cars may sport number plates such as CE08WZC and CA09OKD, both apparently purchased in Llandow (that's in Wales, for those of you who failed Geography GCSE), but the entire family have worked out, within minutes of arriving, that:

1. In Bristol pavement parking is the norm.

and

2. In Bristol parking on Zig-Zags is the norm. Even within spitting distance of a local Police Station, and for ages (check the exif time flags of the photos if you like - I managed to eat Tiger Prawns and consume a pint between clicks). The synchronised hazard warning lights are a neat trick, too.

We welcome this fresh influx of intelligencia to our flock, and encourage them to use our cycle lanes for parking, our pavements for parking, and our Downs for parking.

Remember, these students are the makers and shakers of the future - we ignore them at our peril. Thank goodness they didn't turn up here with bicycles.